What not to say to an overdue pregnant woman

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So now that I am  SLIGHTLY over my due date the 10.000 questions start… I thought it would be beneficial to advise you what things you should NOT say to an overdue pregnant woman…

If you are one of my friends who have actually mentioned these things to me don’t feel bad – I still love you and I know it’s just because you care 😉

Forgive me for sounding a bit grumpy!

Here we go;

  1. He will come when he comes… Really? I’m starting to think he might stay in there
  2. You can be sure he will come some day… OKAY then I’m more relaxed – not!
  3. Have you tried (endless list of things!!) currys, lovemaking, pineapple, stairs, walking, malls, Raspberry leaf tea….. yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and yesssss!
  4. Are you ready for the baby… Yes I’ve been ready since week 35 actually
  5. Are you afraid/nervous/anxious about the birth – just be honest… Well I am now
  6. Have you had the baby yet?We had the baby one week ago without telling you. Honestly we promise to tell!!
  7. Any news… See #6
  8. Any news, just a little?… See #6
  9. Any signs?… See #6
  10. Any signs, just a little?… See #6
  11. Any development yet?… See #6
  12. Any development yet, just a little?… See #6
  13. You should not eat sugar/cake/ice cream/drink coffee… I’m a whale don’t take away my last little piece of fun
  14. You should not walk outside/drive car/go to far away from the house… See #13
  15. When are you due? Oh this week – but you are VERY small/ VERY big… just say I look awesome and don’t comment on size please
  16. You must be really uncomfortable... No I’m light as a feather and its only 45 degrees outside
  17. Don’t worry, Its your turn soon… See #1
  18. Sorry I’m skipping the queue… No, you can’t!!
  19. Sorry I will also have to skip the queue… See #18
  20. Sorry I’m going to give birth on your due date… See #18
  21. You will probably end up needing an induction… ok thanks for predicting that
  22. Are you afraid he will end up being really big and you will need caesarean I am now
  23. Maybe the dates are wrong… I’m not a doctor but maybe you are
  24. When is he coming – we like to see him now… That’s good because we don’t…!?!

In order to create some positive karma here are the GOOD things about still being pregnant in week 40+;

  • I can have whatever food I want whenever I want 
  • Everybody will bring whatever food I want whenever I want 
  • I can take long showers and have lots of me time pampering myself
  • I can eat – again
  • I get a long good night sleep and a huge breakfast. Uninterrupted.
  • I don’t need to worry about sport and diets just yet
  • I can eat during the day in Ramadan if I wish
  • The husband is doing anything at anytime for me 
  • I can go to cinema and eat pop corn till I’m ready to pop. Literally.
  • The baby is very easy to take care of right now
  • More romantic couple time
  • I don’t need to suck in my stomach and worry about flappy skin just yet
  • Body sounds are okay – and with sounds I mean snoring… 😉
  • It’s okay to wear a tight dress and show of a huge belly. It will take some time after labour before I will do that again
  • I can still dream about my baby’s little cute face ❤

And now WHAT to say to a pregnant women?

Easy:

  • Anything that involves you offer an ice cream/cake 😉

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